Immortalize Dewayne Wise

It’s Like the Titanic But Full of Bears!

baseclogger — Sun, 12 Apr 2009 05:52:56 +0000

http://www.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/europe/04/11/polar.bear.attack/index.html

baseclogger

You Can’t Rip the Big Ten for Its Rioting…

baseclogger — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 04:24:03 +0000

https://www.msu.edu/~creswel1/riotstatus/

baseclogger

What Would Happen If?

baseclogger — Mon, 06 Apr 2009 23:20:37 +0000

You dreamed you were dreaming?

baseclogger

Pondering about clogs.

thegrittygrinder — Mon, 06 Apr 2009 22:15:56 +0000

Just think about this one second, there is only one thing in the world where a clog is a good thing, and that my friends, is the game of baseball. It’s ironic because base-clogging is the only time a “clog” turns out to be beneficial in achieving the main purpose in an activity.

For example, a clogged toilet is bad. The goal of dropping a deuce is to get the crap away from you, but if the toilet is clogged, you can’t do that, thus you fail at the activity of taking a dump.

A clogged artery will cause a heart attack and you will die from that on most occasions, meaning you fail the game of life!

A clogged drain – you fail taking a bath or shower.

A clogged pipe – you fail at getting water to your faucet.

Clogged intestine – you’re constipated, and that’s definitely not a success, unless, of course, you have some serious issues that need to be taken care of.

BUT

Clogged bases = run scoring opportunities galore, which in a smart person’s mind, is a good thing if you want to win baseball games. IMO the more run scoring opportunities, the more runs, but that’s only the case 99.7% of the time so people like Joe Morgan and Ozzie Guillen and Dusty Baker use that .3% to argue their point, to which many people side with them.

That kind of crap just annoys me. Its like in any other part of life no one would agree with them:

“excuse me sir, would you rather have $99.70 or 30 cents?”

Dust Bag – “30 cents because there is a chance with proper investment strategies to turn that into more than the other amount of money”

“Wow, and I thought bozo the clown was a moron.”

So seriously, people need to embrace a clog in the only instance that a clog is a good thing. Give base-clogging the love it deserves!

TGG

Jesus and Friends

baseclogger — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 18:14:59 +0000

Go here and read the most recent post:

http://www.toolband.com/news/index.html

baseclogger

Random Link

baseclogger — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 06:00:56 +0000

http://ilovealpacas.com/

baseclogger

Leading Off

thegrittygrinder — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 02:04:05 +0000

Alright, so I say in honor of the shittiness of Dewayne Wise, I rip an article written about him by the always wonderful Joe Cowley.

GLENDALE, Ariz. — The White Sox told Dewayne Wise on Monday morning that he had won their center-field and leadoff jobs. It didn’t take long for the critics to come knocking.

Wow, honestly that surprises you? Dewayne Wise has a career on-base percentage in the majors of .254. .254! Can you even fathom how bad that is? I am not a big fan of batting average, but outside of a few exceptions like Adam Dunn and Jack Cust, if you hit .254 you usually don’t start, let alone lead off. What the hell is Ozzie Guillen thinking?

”Wow,” one ESPN.com columnist wrote. ”In the hierarchy of horribles, giving Dewayne Wise an every-day job is right near the top.”

Great somebody else gets it, but I’m sure you’re going to defend Dewayne because you…I give up there are so many reasons to dislike Dewayne Wise and so few to enjoy watching him as a baseball player. I mean he is 31, so there is no way in hell this guy has any unseen upside left. He has a .309 career OBP in the minors, so he has proven for a decade that he can’t get on base and yet there are people like Joe Cowley that believe in the guy because he hit a home run in the playoffs last year. 11 years> 1 game.

Not that Wise was surprised by the swift and negative reaction.

”Why would I let that bother me?” he said. ”As long as the coaching staff and my teammates believe in me, I could care less what the media or people on the outside say about me.

Jesus Christ. Why would criticism surprise Wise? He has sucked so badly for so long that he probably forgot what praise sounds like, but you let the White Sox and Ozzie Guillen and Hawk Harrelson get a hold of the guy and suddenly there are people that believe in him? Props to the White Sox front office though. I thought the biggest lie they told was that small ball helped them win a World Series in 2005, but convincing people that Dewayne Wise is good is a whole new dimension of lying to your fans.

”I pretty much blow stuff like that out the window. That’s where it belongs. Everybody has their opinion, and I’m not one to let that get me down. I know how [manager Ozzie Guillen] and my teammates feel about me, how they have confidence in me.”

I really don’t care if Wise is down. Honestly it might make him play better.

Wise, 31, said he expected some fallout from the decision because his previous stints with Toronto, Atlanta and Cincinnati didn’t end well. But as teammates have remarked since the start of camp, Wise has a different look this spring. Maybe the late bloomer finally has found his way.

A different look? Oh god what did he do with his hair? Is it blonde like AJ Pierzynski’s? Does he have an afro? Regardless, I don’t think it matters. Again, will just say that 11 years of being awful are far more indicative of a player’s true skill than a look in a guy’s eye in spring training.

”I guess they’re looking at previous years, or previous times where I was put out there on this level,” Wise said. ”You know, 2000 or 2002, where they’re just looking on the back of my baseball card. It’s 2009 now, and I could care less what negativity people want to throw my way.

”It might not have happened as quickly as I wanted it to, but now I’m ready.”

Look, I don’t care about you newfound confidence or attitude, I am a huge White Sox fan and I want them to win. I’ll rephrase, I NEED them to win. You are not a good baseball player, and you won’t be in 2009. What 31 year old guy ever had a breakout season in the majors? Outside of Roy Hobbs, which was in a freaking movie, I can’t name any. You may not care what people think of you, but I care that the White Sox have a rally killer sitting in a position to bat more times than anyone else in the lineup.

Oh and by the way, the best way to predict what a guy will do is look at what he did, so it seems kind of logical for everyone else to look at what you did to predict how you are going to do. And “it” didn’t happen very fast because of how awful you are at baseball. Seriously, did you date rape Ozzie Guillen or something? Players like you do not belong in the majors, let alone in the starting lineup, let alone leading off.

Yuck. C’mon Kenny you’re better than that.

TGG

Have You Ever Noticed?

baseclogger — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 21:56:16 +0000

That you never feel completely healthy? You know, like there is always something about your physical condition that isn’t perfect?

baseclogger

Introduction

baseclogger — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 03:54:44 +0000

Hello. My name on this blog is baseclogger. It’s not my real name. My real name is *BaseClogger*. But they don’t let us use asterisks or caps on this site. Anyways, here are some interesting things about me:

I attend North Face University. My favorite color is sanguine. I love baseball. A lot. My favorite baseball player is Adam Dunn. He has like the all-time record for sacrifice flies or something. I like to play Super Smash Bros for the N64. I also spend a lot of time sitting in front of my laptop waiting for people to post on message boards. That is a problem I’m working on. Kinda.

So this blog is meant to be a place where me and my associate, thegrittygrinder, write stuff and generally try to make each other laugh. Maybe you will find it entertaining, but probably not. It doesn’t really matter. Long live Dewayne Wise (and Ron Paul)!

baseclogger

Intro Part 2

thegrittygrinder — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 05:00:44 +0000

Awesome, so my good friend and I really miss Fire Joe Morgan, what a great blog that was, and we wanted to step in a try to fill some pretty big shoes. So we will try to roast some stupid sports writers (shouldn’t be too hard) and just talk about other stuff in general because we get really random ideas all of the time (like starting a blog).

A little bit about me…I enjoy diversity, and by that I mean an old, old wooden ship used in the civil war. Also I play baseball so we will have none of that “have you ever played the game crap here.”

I like good baseball players, Frank Thomas has to be my favorite, he’s so good.

That’s about it.

Hope everyone enjoys!

TGG